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I always thought my son looked white to me. Maybe thats just because I’m his dad. But since at least his teen years he has always insisted on being full Asian. He says that its not his choice, but that the whole world- including even other Asians- have always treated him as a full-Asian and theres no point in him pretending and begging to be white.
Hes always cursing me and my wife out, and spouts ultra-nationalist propaganda, not just from Asian writers but from Malcolm X , the Black Panthers, Young Lords and Nation of Islam too. Anything thats anti-white. Hes my son, my flesh and blood, but he says I’m just a white guy, and an enemy to him. And that we’re not family.
Is there anyway I can get through to him? Hes as much white as he is Asian, and yet he has totally rejected his white side. He reads very militant Asian blogs and forums which bash interracial relationships such as my own. And despite being the offspring of it, he hates it more than most full-Asians. According to him, the worst humiliation and emasculation for an Asian man is to see all the WM/AF couples, and that it is hell on earth to be born an Asian male out of such a couple. He often threatens suicide, and say it would be better if he were never born. He curses his mother out for not just aborting him at birth.
Despite his intense Asian nationalism, at times he is almost worshipful towards whites. He gets incredibly angry whenever either I or his mom suggest he dates an Asian girl, and praises the perfect beauty of white girls. And sometimes he talks about getting the Asian eye-lid surgery since he says all his problems come from being Asian. He says that his natural look, since he used to look more white as a kid.
I never imagine that the greatest obstacle to my interracial marriage would come not from society, not from whites or asians, but from my own son. You would think a mixed kid would be the last person to hate mixed loved.
My son claims that white men and asian women can never understand what asian men go through, and so his mom and dad have no right to parent him.
Does anyone have any advice on how I can get through to my son?